MORE EDUCATION POEMS

DOUBLE NEGATIVES

Double negatives don't need no explainin'.
We don't need no water when it ain't rainin'
Teachers shouldn't confuse us this way.
Our friends don't misunderstand what we don’t say.

Why worry about what has never been not seen?
Will anyone never not know what we don't mean?
English doesn't ask that we never not study her.
So double negatives shouldn't never not occur.

A JUST GRADE

When caught cheating, a boy named Biff
Said: "I don't deserve a zero in Western Civ."
I heard his plea,
And had to agree,
But it was the LOWEST grade I could give.

TRUE OR FALSE?

For true-false tests, here's a system for you.
Remember: "Tails" is false, and "Heads" is true.
You get it goin'
By flipping a coin,
And finish with odds that are one in two.

Since the odds are not good on first sight,
An added feature is brought to light.
You continue the plan
By flipping again
To see if your answers are wrong or right.

THE CHEATER

She said she wasn’t a cheater.
But I had reason not to believe her.
The boy on the next row
Wrote "I don't know."
And she wrote "I don't know either!"

THE MYSTERY OF NUMBERS

Algebra’s not easy for anyone.
Even the best say it’s not fun.
But I saw a wrinkle on Charlie's brow,
I was excited—encouraged, somehow.

You see, Charlie was great at basketball,
But his math skills were not there at all.
My boardwork was good; I was in command.
And I felt proud as I saw him raise his hand.

As surely as the fisherman sets his hook,
I had gained the attention of Charlie Cook.
But his query left me room to doubt:
"Where do them numbers go when you rub 'em out?"


YOU CAN QUOTE ME

As a student, it's oft been affirmed:
"A penny saved is a penny earned."
But I wish instead,
A book that's read
Was also a book that's learned.